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Rollercoaster/Transcript
(The scene opens up with the camera zooming into the backyard.) Phineas: So, Ferb, what do you wanna do today? (Ferb shrugs) ''What about Perry, what does he want to do?(''Perry chatters) ''Well, he's a platypus. They don't do much. I for one, am starting to get bored, and boredom is something up with which I will not put! The first thing they're gonna ask us when we get back to school is "what did we do over the summer?". I mean, no school for three months, our life should be a roller coaster! And I mean a ''good roller coaster, not like that one we rode at the state fair. (Flashback on roller coaster at state fair. It goes over one tiny hill then ends.) Fair Worker: Please exit to the left. Phineas: Man, that was lame. Why, if I built a roller coaster I would... that's it! I know what we're gonna do today! Linda: Phineas, Ferb. I'm gonna pick up a few things. You boys stays out of trouble, okay. Phineas: Okay, Mom. We're gonna build a roller coaster! (Linda get's into the caras Candace goes from behind the window to in front of the car.) Candace: I'm in charge, right? You did tell them I'm in charge? Linda: Relax Candace, nobody has to be in charge. Candace: But what if there's a emergency? Linda: Like what? Candace: What if, uh... (gasps) What if a satellite falls out of orbit and crashes into the house? (smiles) Linda: If that happens, you're in charge. Candace: Yes! (Back in the backyard.) ''Mom says I'm in charge, conditionally. '''Phineas:' Whatever. Candace: Wait a minute, what are you doing?. Phineas: Homework. Candace: It's summer. Phineas: That's cool, you'll wait to the last minute then. Candace: Well, I'm watching you. And I'm in charge, conditionally! (Candace walks into the house and the phone rings, which she answers.) ''Hello? Oh, hi, Stacy! No, I can't go to the mall right now. Mom just went to the store. She left me in charge. Well, you know, conditionally. ''(Phineas and Ferb walks past with lost of wooden planks.) ''Oh! If you go, can you see if Jeremy's there? No, no, he's the cute one that works at Mr. Slushy Burger. ''(Phineas and Ferb walks past again, with steel beams.) ''Yeah, he totally smiled at me last time I was there. I just about died. No, I told you I can't, I'm watching my brother and step-brother. ''(Phineas and Ferb walks past with sinks and toilets.) ''Yeah, and they never get into trouble, 'cause mom never catches them. One of these days though, I'm gonna see to it that she catches them red handed. ''(Phineas and Ferb walks past again, with a lion that roars.) ''Will you hold it down, I am trying to use the phone! Well, Mom left me in charge, so there'll be no shenanigans today. What are they doing right now? Why do you ask? What do you mean, you can see it from your house? See what?! ''(Candace runs out to the backyard and sees the boys making ihe rollercoaster.) ''Phineas, what is this?! '''Phineas:' Do you like it? Candace: Ooh, I'm gonna go tell mom, and when she sees what you are doing, you're going down. Down! Down! Down! D-O-W-N, Down! (Phineas and Ferb look blankly while she walks away.) Phineas: We're gonna need a blowtorch and some more peanut butter. (Candace takes her bicycle and rides away.) Isabella: Hey Candace, is Phineas... home? Candace: Down, Down I say! (Isabella walks into the backyard.'' She has hearts in her eyes.)'' Isabella: Hey Phineas. Phineas: Hey Isabella. Isabella: Whatcha doin'? Phineas: Building a roller coaster. Isabella: In your backyard? Phineas: Some of it. Isabella: Wow. Isn't that kind of impossible? Phineas: Some might say. Isabella: Hey Ferb. (Ferb waves with the hammer.) ''Does your step-brother ''ever ''talk? '''Phineas:' Ferb? He's more of a man of action. (Ferb hits the nail and then his nose.) Isabella: I was gonna go to the pool, you wanna go swimming? Phineas: Kind of in the middle of something here. Isabella: Oh, right. Okay, I'll see you later then. Phineas: Okay. Hey Ferb! You got enough rivets up there? (Ferb gives a thumbs up and rivets three rivets in place. They gleam and Ferb blows on the nozzle of the riveter.) ''Hey, where's Perry? ''(Perry walks around the corner of the house. He jumps up, puts on a fedora and walks into a hole in the wall. He goes down a lift, into a lair, where he gets an "Incoming Message".) Major Monogram: Good morning Agent P. The evil Dr. Doofenshmirtz is up to his old tricks. For reasons unknown to us, he's bought up 80% of the country's tin foil. I want you to get over to his hideout right away, find out what he's up to, and put a stop to it. As always Agent P, It is imperative that your cover identity as a mindless domestic pet remains intact. Now, get out there, were all counting on you.(Agent P jumps into a platypus-themed hovercraft, and flies through a tunnel. Agent P leaves through a stone and holding his fedora down, hides his secret identity from Phineas and Ferb.) Phineas: So the way I see it, the solid fuel rockets kick in in the mall parking lot. Then we release the snakes during the corkscrew around the interstate. I'm gonna go get the snakes. (Phineas leaves as Ferb puts on his welding mask and starts welding using the blowtorch. Candace runs into the store to get her mom.) Candace: Mom! You gotta come home, right now. Linda: Did a satellite crash into the house? Candace: No, no, no. You gotta see what Phineas and Ferb are doing. Linda: Seems like we've had this conversation before. Candace: What do you mean? Linda: I seem to recall you telling me, that the boys were training monkeys to juggle bicycles. And when I come home, there was a stunning lack of monkeys. Candace: I still don't know how they cleaned that up so fast. Linda: So what's the emergency this time? Candace: They're building a roller coaster! Linda: Candace, seriously, isn't Phineas a little young to be a roller coaster engineer? (Phineas talks to a main in a car factory.) Factory Manager: Aren't you a little young to be a roller coaster engineer? Phineas: Yes, yes I am. Factory Manager: Well, I must say, I'm very impressed, the form all seems to be in order, although I'd never seen them filled out in crayon before. So, if there's anything I can get you, anything at all, just let me know. Phineas: Do you think we could borrow one of those gadgets? (A robot arm fixing a car is shown. Phineas and Ferb are riding on the roller coaster that is being built by the robot arm.) ''Now this is the life. ''(The camera zooms in on the Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated building. Agent P swings into the building's window.) Doofenshmirtz: Ah, Perry The Platypus, what an unexpected surprise. And by unexpected, I mean, COMPLETELT EXPECTED! (Doofenshmirt presses a button which activates arms that grab Agent P) ''I, Doctor Heinz Doofenshmirtz, have covered the entire eastern seaboard in tin foil. And when I put my giant magnet, next to my ingenius, Magnetism Magnifier, I will pull the east, in westerly direction, thereby reversing the rotation of the earth. You may ask well yourself, "Why would he do this? What could he possibly have to gain?" Well, let me just answer that by saying I haven't really worked on all the bugs yet. I mean, you know, the tin foil alone costs a lot. ''(The camera cuts back to the store.) Candace: But mom, I'm telling you, they're building it, and it's huge. (Ferb puts up a poster to the coaster.) ''Phineas and Ferb present "The Coolest Coaster Ever" now open? Mom! 'Pedro:' Phineas and Ferb got a roller coaster? You think we get a discount if we bring the flier? '''Another kid:' Maybe we better take it. Candace: Here, look, look, look, see, I told you I'm not crazy, I told you! Linda: And you're not crazy because? (Candace screams) ''I see your point Candace, no crazy person would scream at a post like that. I'd be in the dairy section if you wanna come yell at some cheese or anything. ''(At the house, where the start of the coaster is, there are many kids going into a tent. As the last kid goes in, Ferb closes the velvet rope and the tent flaps. There is a stage inside the tent. Ferb walks onto the stage, up to the microphone, taps it as if he's about to speak, then steps out of the way as Phineas rises in with dramatic, dry ice smoke covering him.) '' '' Phineas: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages. May I present to you, a spectacle most of the morning in making. The coolest... coaster... ever! (Ferb, after playing the drums and a guitar, still wearing a miner's hat and a disco ball, reveals the coaster. As music plays, a bird files into the coaster and falls to the ground.) ''So, who wants to go first? ''(After the bird hits the ground, everyone raises their hands. Later, on the coaster) ''To fasten, insert the tab inside the metal buckle. To release, just pull back on the, oops. ''(Phineas drops the safety belt and it makes a small dust cloud.) ''Well, you'll get the picture. Well, that's about it, enjoy the ride. ''(The cars stop at the top of the hill, viewing the long drop down of the city) ''You all signed the waivers, right? ''(The car goes down the first hill, around the coaster's twists, turns, and drops of the track. Everyone screams as the coaster goes on the promised corkscrew aroung the interstate. Going trough the vat of snakes, everyone's still screaming.) ''Relax, they're just rubber. ''(The car then goes into a bucket of mud for three seconds, then exits. Later, now covered in rubber snakes and mud, the cars go trough a car wash, to be cleaned from the mud and snakes. They come out shiny clean.) ''Hey, look, here comes the A-A-A-A! ''(The track is going up and down repeatedly, creating four "A"s from the kids. The cars loop around the Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated building and the camera goes back to Perry and Doofenshmirtz.) Doofenshmirtz: If I really make my money back, I-I-I could buy a bunch of spacing real estate, and sell it again with a nice sunset view. I could- (Agent P sends a screw at Doofenshmirtz, which Doof ducks away from.) ''Ha, you missed! ''(The screw flies to the roof, hits a line in the lightwork, which throws it back at Doofenshmirtz foot.) ''Aaaooww!! Ow, Ow, Ow, Aaaooowww! (''Doofenshmirtz jumps around and accentually releases Agent P, who quickly attacks Doofenshmirtz. During the fight, where they use wreches as swords, Perry hits Doof in the "screw"ed foot) ''Aaaooowww. (Also, Doofenshmirtz pushes a battery cart toward Perry and activates the Magnetism Magnifier.) Now, you are too late. Quake in your boots and watch helplessly, as the unimaginably electromagnetic forces, pull the eastern seaboard, thereby reversing rotation of the... (''All the tin foil releases from the buildings.) ''Well...that didn't work. ''(The tin foil forms into a giant ball, flying through the air.) ''And now, we have a two ton ball of tin foil traveling 200 mph directly at us! Quickly, we must separate the magnet from the magnifier before it's to late! ''(Back at the store.) Linda: Now, I know I have that club card in here somewhere. I always have it with me, but my purse is such a disaster area, you know how it is. (Candace hears the coaster and calls for Linda.) Candace: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! Mom, Mom! (Back at the Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated building, Perry and Doof are still trying to seperate the magnet from the magnifier.) Doofenshmirtz: It's no use, it's no use, we are doomed! (Agent P sees a helicopter and fires a grappling hook onto the bottom of the helicopter, and takes the magnet with it.) You did it! You saved us Perry the Platypus! (The ball of tin foil crashes through the building bringing Doofenshmirtz with it.) ''Curse you, Perry the Platypus! ''(The magnet pulls the Magnetism Magnifier onto it, and gets stuck on the coaster, which then follows the helicopter into the sky. Candace pulls Linda into the parking lot to reveal the coaster which has been removed.) Candace: Look, look, look, see! Linda: ...Okay, I've give up, what am I supposed to be looking at? Candace: No, it's not possible! Linda: I'm going to get the cart. Candace: It was right here, and it was huge! Mom! Linda: Time to go. I've got frozens. Candace: Okay, so you think that Phineas and Ferb are still under that stupid tree in the backyard, right? Linda: Well, yes. That would be my guess. Candace: Fine, then lets go home. Now! (Agent P sees that the helicopter is smoking and cuts the rope. He drops down onto the coaster and into the car, right behind Phineas and Ferb.) Phineas: Oh, there you are Perry. (Perry chatters) ''Nice hat Isabella. ''(Isabella takes of Agent P's fedora off' and looks at it, confused. The car goes to the end of the track and lands in the streets, flying into a construction area, and onto a crane, which flings them into the air.) Funny, I don't remember this in the blueprints. ''(An airplane picks up the car on its tail.) And I'm sure this is new. ''(Candace sees the airplane from Linda's car, going the other way, and laughs, blinking with one eye at a time.) '' '''Linda: I worry about you sometimes Candace. (The coaster car drops down from the plane and onto the Statue of Liberty, bending it and throwing the car towards the woods in South Dakota. After the cars do loops in Teddy Roosevelt's glasses on Mount Rushmore, it lands on a pine tree which bends down so they end up in front of a Mr. Slushy Burger.) Slushy Dog Employee: Welcome to Mr. Slushy Burger, may I take your order. Phineas: Anyone wants fries? (Before anyone can take an order, the tree bends back and throws them to Paris, France onto a bendable Eiffel Tower bending all th eway to a croissant shop.) French Man: Croissant? Phineas: Anyone want a croissant? (The cars get flung from the tower up to the sky and into orbit around the Earth in space.) Singing Voice: Aahh-Aahh-Aaahhh (A satellite flies by and beeps 3 times) Phineas: You know, if that thing crashes to earth, Candace is in charge. (The cars suddenly fall down towards earth, the front car catches on fire re-entering the atmosphere. Cloud cover is seen and then, with the fire, disappears with an extreme downshot towards the Tri-State A''rea.)'' We should've charged more. (Linda pulls the car on the driveway and Candace jumps out.) Linda: Okay, we're here, are you happy now, Candace? (She opens the gate to the backyard and doesn't see Phineas or Ferb.) Candace: Yes. See mom, I told you they weren't there. (Linda pokes her head through the gate opening and sees the boys.) Linda: Oh, hi boys. Phineas: Hi Mom. Linda: Come on Candace, help me with the groceries. Candace: But but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but... Linda: Let's go! (Linda pulls Candace away from the boys, who tries to struggle out of her hold. In the backyard, the kids drops down, one by one, from the tree.) Kid: Hey Phineas, that was great. Pedro: Way too cool. Third kid: That was awesome, can we do it again? Phineas: Sorry, only one ride per customer. Isabella: That was great Phineas. So, what are you gonna do tomorrow? Phineas: Don't know yet. Isabella: Maybe you can teach Perry some tricks. Phineas: Well, he is a platypus, they don't do much. Ferb: They're the only mammals to lay eggs. Phineas: ...Maybe he'll lay an egg. Isabella: Cool, see you tomorrow. It really was the coolest coaster ever, you guys make a great team. Phineas: Well, a brother is a brother. (He slaps Ferb on the shoulder.) ''But I couldn't have asked for a better one than Ferb. You know what I mean? ''(Ferb burps.) ''Oh-ho-ho, ''man! I can smell the peanut butter! Isabella: Well that ''was impressive, see you guys. '''Phineas:' So, what should we do tomorrow? There's a world of possibilities. Maybe we should make a list? (The coaster cars explode in the tree, a car alarm and dog barks can be heard.) Candace: Mom! Linda: Give it a rest Candace! (The tin foil ball rolls in the background.) (Credits roll.) Male Singer: He's a semi-aquatic, egg-laying mammal of action! Backing scat: Dooby dooby doo-bah, Dooby dooby doo-bah Male Singer: He's a furry little flatfoot, who'll never flinch from a fray-ee-ay-ee-ay! He's got more than just mad skill, Female Singer: Wah-ah-ah Male Singer: He's got a beaver's tail and a bill, Female Singer: Bah-bah Male Singer: And the women swoon whenever they hear him say: ''(Agent P chatters and women faint.) ''He's Perry, Perry the Platypus! Category:Transcripts